Deck 1

Deck 1 contains job descriptions and personalities for the modular crew members.

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You're the JOB HERE on the Jolly Rancher, which means you JOB DESCRIPTION HERE. You are PERSONALITY DESCRIPTION HERE. The other sailors HOW DO OTHER SAILORS FEEL ABOUT THEM, but you HOW DO THEY FEEL ABOUT THE OTHER SAILORS.

Engineer

You're the engineer on the Jolly Rancher. You report to the boatswain, and are in charge of keeping the ship operating at peak performance - although in the case of a "fine" ship of this caliber, keeping the ship operating at all is a 24-hour job for the three of you. But it's actually okay - your iridescent lemur pal, Mr. Wadsworth, helps you out. None of the other pirates seem to be able to see him, but Mr. Wadsworth says that's just because they don't believe. You're a good lemur, aren't you, Mr. Wadsworth?!!

Cabin Boy

You are the cabin boy for the officers here on the Jolly Rancher, which means it is your job to clean up their cabins and assist them in their duties. Secretly, though, you harbor an unrequited love for the captain. You know he would never take you, since you are only thirteen years old, but oh, you so long to be more than just his cabin boy!

Able Seaman

You're one of the able seamen on the Jolly Rancher, which means you perform day-to-day piratical duties such as standing watch, manning the helm, and operating machinery. The Quartermaster is in charge of you, and you're in charge of the Deckhand. You are short-tempered and alcoholic, but you have a heart of gold. You would gladly risk your life to save one of your pirate brethren in a bad situation.

Barista

You're the Barista on the Jolly Rancher. The job of Barista is far more involved than most pirates realize. The mixing and serving of caffeinated beverages is not only essential to maintaining the alertness of the crew - it is also an ancient and highly spiritual art form, in which you are a highly trained master. You spent years on the peak of Mount Kilimanjaro, studying 20 hours a day, but it was all worth it - your macchiato is unmatched the world over.

Ship's Linguist

You're the linguist here on the Jolly Rancher, which means it is your job to make sure that everyone is speaking correct pirate dialects. The slackness of this crew amazes and appalls you: in the past week alone, you have heard five separate crew members speaking Standard English. This behavior simply cannot be tolerated. You must put an end to it.

Document Librarian

You're the document librarian on the Jolly Rancher, which means you keep track of all the piratey documents: treasure maps, ransom notes, shopping lists... shit like that. You are by far the most educated pirate on the ship: you know all 19 letters of the alphabet! The other sailors distrust you slightly, but you know that's because they secretly admire your book learnin'.

Deckhand

You're the deckhand on the Jolly Rancher. It isn't the most glamorous job in the world. Generally, it consists of swabbin', swabbin', and did we mention, more swabbin'. That's why you're looking forward to the Captain's birthday party - it should provide a much needed break from swabbin' the damn decks. How much swabbin' can a deck take, anyway! That reminds you, you need to pick up some more swabs while you're here.

Intern

You're the intern on the Jolly Rancher. You're here on a summer program from the Threepwood Memorial School for Advanced Pirate Studies. Being an intern is kind of a crappy job. Even the barista and the deckhand outrank you. However, you are assured that you're learning "valuable pirate skills" here. You're not so sure about that, but at least it will look good on your resume, and maybe help you get into a good crew after you graduate.